Many of my friends suffer depression, and I am not untouched by it. Although when asked if I have ever been suicidal, well only once. When I was given medicine for the depression as a teen, the medicine made me want death. For me, i see it different usually. I have heard other survivors say it, and truth is really so much more than the words say. I don’t want to die, however on my darkest days, I do wish I had never been born. Days where the pain feels more than I am able to bear, when the nightmares are stronger than the dreams. Those are the days where I have to recount all i have done. Those are the days when my blessings must be noted. And those are the days when kindness is most needed, and when I am at my least kind.
Breaking the Legacy of Silence #10: You Matter
http://five2onemagazine.com/breaking-legacy-silence-10-matter/
Kim Bailey Deal addresses suicide from several angles, with the bottom line being–YOU MATTER.
Please read and share.
Just a thought
I generally try not to rant, or be opinionated here. However, some opinions just eat at you, until they are released. I have been in a big truck a few times, as a passenger. I have seen how truly amazing this country is. I have also seen the worst in people. I will only speak of one issue right now. Parking. Big trucks can be up to seventy feet in length. And are limited to how long the can be operated by law.
That being said, I can’t tell you how common it is to see a pickup truck in a big truck spot in rest areas or travel plazas. The frequency is astonishing. Add to that the fact that there are more trucks on the road than possible parking spots and you have a very frustrating situation for our nation’s drivers.
7 Editing Rules That Will Totally Transform Your Next Post.
1. DON’T PAD YOUR PROSE WITH EMPTY FILLER WORDS (Or: Avoid Using Grammar Expletives) Grammar expletives are literary constructions that begin with the words it, here, or therefollowed by a form of …
Source: 7 Editing Rules That Will Totally Transform Your Next Post.
IS IT REALLY?
Soon we two will be between the same walls
Your voice, your scent, the truth in your eyes
Will now forever be a part of me
Despite my adrenalin faintly permeating
The fresh onslaught of oxygen
Pumping at its utmost
I expect to be imperceptible
A ghost
As I move into your space
Your restless eyes
Passing me by
Hesitating for a blink
As a preternatural twinge
Arises from your brain
Warning you an observer
Is in the area
But like all moderns
You ignore that extra sense
Continuing on, walking by
As my looping mind
Consoles me
Reminds me
Skin-deep counts
In a world where plainness is maligned
© 2016 Clarissa Simmens (ViataMaja)
IMAGE: Beauty is only skin deep by chemicalrachel-xd.deviantart.com
Relationships and how they work.
I am not really good at people, and the interworkings of being a good friend or significant other. Mostly because I speak my mind and am damaged from abuse in my past. So speaking my mind means that what I say doesn’t often make sense to others. Add to this those days when I am in pain, or have insomnia, or even just am deeply into my own world and forget to socialize on occasion.
How I have managed to be so richly blessed in my friends and loved ones, I am not sure. Still, I treasure those who are close to me. And I am not the sort to hold a grudge, mostly. So it sometimes surprises me how angry people can get. And how vindictive they can become.
Relationships take work. All of them. Even family and friends, if you want a good solid relationship, you need to be willing to compromise. On both sides. This is much of why I am bad at people. I have a hatd time with compromise. I can’t afford to compromise because I have been forged by others lack of compromise. I do not ask much. I take care of my daughter, and of my best friend. I try to be there for my closest friends and family.
Now that being said, I am surprised tonight. A little over a year ago I had a friend pull away, for a reason that made no sense. So I accepted that I had lost a friend, and as I always do, I picked up and moved on. Tonight she messaged me with an apology, and an explanation. It eased my mind to finally understand. It also got me considering what goes into friendship. How often have I unwittingly hurt the ones around me because I was unable to explain? I found myself sad that I really couldn’t answer. So many people I have perhaps hurt. I apologize for those I have not intended to hurt. Sometimes the explanation is another form of compromise. Which is one of my flaws, for sure.
Opportunity
My Promise to You, PTSD
Dear PTSD,
You have controlled my husband for five years now, and I’m writing to tell you that it’s time to let him go. We need him back.
Unshackle him. He is no longer your prisoner.
Day after day, year after year, you have mercilessly put him through every test possible. You have relentlessly forced him to jump over every last hurdle, just to keep going. He’s beyond exhausted… he’s empty. What more does he have to prove?
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Unseen Reality Ch.1
I had finally made it, graduation day had come at last. I was accepted to UNCC to pursue a degree in creative writing. The program’s I was interested in was a toss up between writing and computer technology for video game development. Excitement swelled within me to the point that I was crying.
A knock at the door brought me back to reality. My best friend Alaina breezed through the door all smiles carrying a bouquet of tiger lilies which happen to be my most favorite flowers in the entire universe besides the lotus flower. “Congratulations Bestie!” She screamed with so much energy that I had to ground myself for the impact. “Thanks Alaina, for a while with all the drama with my parents I didn’t think I would make it.” I sat down on my futon looking off into space. Alaina walked over standing in front of me, taking my…
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Friday Fantasy ~ The Gem Master
Reblogged on WordPress.com
Source: Friday Fantasy ~ The Gem Master
