Not today dear

I know I should write,
Should create and
share my light.
I should tell my story
For all the world to hear.
Not today dear.

There is laundry
To wash, dry and fold.
There is blog entries
Left to be told.
Poetry I must
Write so well.
Social activity
To lessen my hell.
Not today dear,
Can’t you tell?

Today was just
A wee bit much,
So though there is
A lot of stuff
Requiring me to do….
Not today dear.

The difficulty of historical accuracy

              My work in process,  Elizabeth,  is split between two different times. The first is 1494. Now i can keep it historically accurate.  I have done the research.  However,  I am running into a flow issue… as well as a language synaptic issue.  I know where i want to carry the story.  It will be a romantic adventure circling around two women in the same family a century apart. I have posted the first chapter.  I have chapter two written.  It’s the third chapter where things fall apart.
.                    I wonder if it would be better just to write the story then go back and edit the language. I am not sure I really want to have the complete historical accuracy anyway.  The language back then was extremely dry and wordy. Thus far I have only kept a slight accuracy. This story has been a W.I.P. for over 20 years.  It would be nice to finally finish it.

Distorted imagery

You see me
As internet celebrity,
With no sign of lifestyle
Truth in chains.
Not one person
Really knowing me,
Hidden behind an easy profile.
According to you,
Written with naught
But imagination and lies.

Could it be?
that it’s you who
doesn’t see?
Who does not know
The real me?
quietly hiding,
From what you never
Tried to see.
Deeply imbedded
Within us.

Each  of my poems
was written,
From the
darkness within
The soul .

Though some
Can prose,
Flowers and glows,
Many just don’t know
Why and how.

No soul
Unspoiled,
Tainted,
Passes through
Poems muse,
Unburdened.

Each path
A choice,
Each soul,
A voice.

Speak,
In line,
In verse.
Hold back nothing.

Elizabeth chapter one

To whoever may find this,
      I realize I was fairly naive. I believed the world would change for me. I thought I would be able to do anything. I know better now. I should have known then. I ask that you reserve your judgments until my tale is finished. It is the year of our lord fourteen ninety-eight. I had thought that in the reign of Henry the VII that England would be civilized. I was born to a noble house and having always had plenty of money. I never abused my wealth, Tis against my nature. I was simply myself, nothing more.                  
           I started healing various ailments. Having a small talent for herbal craft, but having little patience for the training the doctors went through. The idea of using leeches disgusted me. The church endorsed their use, thus it became the accepted way to deal with all illness, but I did not see where it helped some of the ill at all. I oft healed those the doctor’s thought to be hopeless . Simple herbal remedies that brought comfort to the ailing and aged. Arthritis to madness, there was no one I would not treat. And I expected naught in return. If I had paid heed to the tongues that wagged, I would have been prepared. I gave freely to the poor and to the wretched. I spent much time with the ill and insane. I spoke of acceptance to those who had sinned. For why would God not forgive, when it is what was promised?
          My father begged me to hold my tongue about such matters. He said my flaming hair would garner accusations and my shrewish tongue would prove them. I was beautiful then, of this I have no doubt. Though then it mattered so little. Vanity was not a sin I have ever committed.  Most of  the accused committed no other crime than that. A lord’s daughter should not be so reckless. I suppose now I should have heard clearer what he said. You understand, of course, I knew it all then. I had no shame, only pride.
            I ignored the witch hunters. I was no witch, so I saw no need to pay them mind. The whispers around town were of torture and of evil things being done to the accused; the whispers spoke of jealousies and false accusations as well. None of this touched me, It should have. The accusation was made a week ago. I assumed the wealth and power my father had would free me or the magistrate would dismiss on the clear fact that it was nonsense. When the hunters came, I was unafraid. I stood up against the mob and the jeers. For what could hurt me? I had the truth, and I had God. I would soon find out how little that was.
          I was stripped of all my clothes and belongings. I was allowed no modesty. Nor any comfort was I given. I was even denied all traces of humanity. The magistrate and his helpers searched for the mark of the beast that would prove me false. A mark that did not ever exist. They looked for a symbol or a brand, even a mole or blemish. I am sure any mark would have sufficed. For this would prove their accusations, at least in the eyes of the court. I did not cry then. The exam was embarrassing and long.  I was made to stand the entire time. I was pinched and poked. Then prodded with cold metal to see that I yet bled. Yet, even then I was unafraid. I was stretched on a rack and told to admit myself the witch. I was left for hours pulled taught and in pain. I would not lie. My jailers refused to believe anything I said. The days got worse as each passed. I found torture to be too kind a description for the cruelty I endured. Forced to endure thumbscrews, and hot pincers that left me weak. I have felt the health flee me as the days have gone on.  For the last two days I found myself left alone with my thoughts. That was the worst of torments, as it can easily drive one mad. I was given naught except moldy bread and dirty water every evening. After a time I ate, and was thankful for it.                                                 
     As the seventh day dawns, I find fear in my heart and prayers on my lips. I have never broken the covenant with God nor man, but find that my death approaches faster than I ever thought it would. I write this on the parchment left for my confession, one I will write naught. Although I do suppose it will be seen as such regardless. My flaming hair hangs matted now, as bathing has not been allowed me.  I fear the filth has caused fever to set in. I hear whispers at night of a young man’s voice. The voice speaks of possibilities and freedom. I am sure the voice is a sign that my mind is cracking, or my will breaking. Either way, I cannot remain here.
                 Come the dawn I will try escape, and perhaps the voices who whisper of aid they will lend me are more than just my fever speaking. Either that or the attempt will mean my life; it will be an ending to my torment. I pray god is with me.
Elizabeth

Hope belied(not sure on the title)

                    The wind whispered through the slim gaps at the windows edge. So much of her struggle couldn’t be explained. She couldn’t put the pain and emotion into clear words. Even having survived this far, she continued to be surprised by all life threw at her. “Time to pull yourself together!” She thought.  “He’ll be here soon. Decision time!” Oh, how she hated the life changing choices.
                    Dating a truck driver meant either long periods alone or choosing to ride with. In her mind both options sounded awful. Her love for him was certain, everything else felt like a lava pit she was suspended above. So as her lover knocked on the motel door,  she knew she would go. In many ways, it felt like she had nothing to leave behind. She opened the door,  letting him in. Quick hugs made the shadow of doubt fade. No one understood what she saw in him. He was just tall enough to allow her head to rest comfortably on his shoulders.  His unruly red curls seemed to wrap around her heart.  The strength in his arms when he wrapped her in them, made her feel delicate and feminine.  Which is something she had never felt. He understood her quirks.  He made her laugh. 
                    Though she still didn’t know what he saw in her, she knew she would go. The details were quickly handled. With the dawn her new adventure would begin.  A far greater adventure than anyone could ever know. He told her the truck had been handling strangely. He really wasn’t sure why. The engine was a advanced prototype.  He was being paid more to test the engine than most truck drivers ever see. “Our first stop needs to be a special shop, so I can have it checked out.” He spoke distracted as he helped her climb into the rig for the first time.
                    Climbing into the big truck for the first time scared her. At five two she was used to being under most things,  in the truck she felt like she was flying over everything. 

*authors note:  this is only on it’s first draft. Constructive criticism is welcome,  but trolling is not.