Day twenty two

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Ack mornings.  Even more ack routine.  I sit and play on my social media till I am awake.  No real routine to that.

Day one

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Okay I am sick…so admittedly I really am not up to doing a lot.  I am hoping a small writing challenge will excite my brain.  And this seems like it might just be fun. But don’t fault me for it being slightly less than my usual.
            So day one….Name five problems with Social media.

           1. No one truly listens to each other.  Everyone has an opinion and social media is often the outlet of choice.  So because everyone is posting their opinion,  no one really wants to hear it. So we fail to listen to what is really being said.

        2. Many people are not being who they are on social media.  There is way too often a who I am in real life and who I am online. The line should not exist.

       3. Social media is not often a safe place.  Images that are triggering and or cruel often make it past the filters set in place to create a safe experience. And then one’s that are non harmful end up being pulled.

       4. Posting random things because you like it will cause your family to worry.

       5. Nowadays,  social media is considered to be something everyone should do.  Oversharing is no longer seen as bad.

R.I.P. Chyna

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                    I Grew up watching wrestling.  I was basically the only girl among a house full of boys.  And though I enjoyed wrestling…. you were what caused me to love it. To look forward to it. For you were equal to the men. You were strong and beautiful… you had an intelligence that was far more than was expected in your profession. Please may you rest in peace,  for your light will truly be missed here.

Words, tool or weapon?

                     I am a writer,  a poet. A lot of what I write is gibberish to start. I then go back and polish, much as one would polish a gem. It is for me the easiest way I know to deal with major issues is to write it  out.  However here lately I often find myself needing to watch more of what I say.  It’s so easy to be careless with our words….and those careless words can do more harm than  we realize. I have always understood this.  One of my favorite poems,  that i discovered in High School,  spoke of this….
——————————————————————–
The Stone
By Wilfred Wilson Gibson

“And will you cut a stone for him,
To set above his head?
And will you cut a stone for him–
A stone for him?” she said.

Three days before, a splintered rock
Had struck her lover dead–
Had struck him in the quarry dead,
Where, careless of a warning call,
He loitered, while the shot was fired–
A lively stripling, brave and tall,
And sure of all his heart desired . . .
A flash, a shock,
A rumbling fall . . .
And, broken ‘neath the broken rock,
A lifeless heap, with face of clay,
And still as any stone he lay,
With eyes that saw the end of all.

I went to break the news to her:
And I could hear my own heart beat
With dread of what my lips might say;
But some poor fool had sped before;
And, flinging wide her father’s door,
Had blurted out the news to her,
Had struck her lover dead for her,
Had struck the girl’s heart dead in her,
Had struck life, lifeless, at a word,
And dropped it at her feet:
Then hurried on his witless way,
Scarce knowing she had heard.

And when I came, she stood alone–
A woman, turned to stone:
And, though no word at all she said,
I knew that all was known.

Because her heart was dead,
She did not sigh nor moan.
His mother wept:
She could not weep.
Her lover slept:
She could not sleep.
Three days, three nights,
She did not stir:
Three days, three nights,
Were one to her,
Who never closed her eyes
From sunset to sunrise,
From dawn to evenfall–
Her tearless, staring eyes,
That, seeing naught, saw all.

The fourth night when I came from work,
I found her at my door.
“And will you cut a stone for him?”
She said: and spoke no more:
But followed me, as I went in,
And sank upon a chair;
And fixed her grey eyes on my face,
With still, unseeing stare.
And, as she waited patiently,
I could not bear to feel
Those still, grey eyes that followed me,
Those eyes that plucked the heart from me,
Those eyes that sucked the breath from me
And curdled the warm blood in me,
Those eyes that cut me to the bone,
And cut my marrow like cold steel.

And so I rose and sought a stone;
And cut it smooth and square:
And, as I worked, she sat and watched,
Beside me, in her chair.
Night after night, by candlelight,
I cut her lover’s name:
Night after night, so still and white,
And like a ghost she came;
And sat beside me, in her chair,
And watched with eyes aflame.

She eyed each stroke,
And hardly stirred:
she never spoke
A single word:
And not a sound or murmur broke
The quiet, save the mallet stroke.

With still eyes ever on my hands,
With eyes that seemed to burn my hands,
My wincing, overwearied hands,
She watched, with bloodless lips apart,
And silent, indrawn breath:
And every stroke my chisel cut,
Death cut still deeper in her heart:
The two of us were chiselling,
Together, I and Death.

And when at length my job was done,
And I had laid the mallet by,
As if, at last, her peace were won,
She breathed his name, and, with a sigh,
Passed slowly through the open door:
And never crossed my threshold more.

Next night I laboured late, alone,
To cut her name upon the stone.
—————————————————–

So I try to think before I speak… but I really have no filter. Most people who know me realize this and overlook the random strange that occasionally comes out from me. However I do try to be kind.  So much so that I have avoided a few topics because I know I cannot be kind.  While I would feel no problem with my actions when it comes to being cruel to those involved… being mean there brings me to close to acting like them.  Do you censor yourself on any topic?  If so why?

The voice of a rose

                    This is the second time I have tried to do this post. My Facebook friends list is filled with writer’s. I did that on purpose. I surrounded myself on social media with writer’s and artists and crafty people, so i no longer felt as alone. This morning, one of the writer’s, Author T L Grey, posed a question. As she posted two pictures with it…one of her (a truly lovely woman) and one of a soft white rose with pink edges….I doubt that she wanted the answer I gave her. The question?  “If a rose could speak,  what would it say?” My response?  “That it was dying and missed it’s bush. The loneliness was unbearable.” Well at first she responded Carpe diem. Then she changed it to read “Why be one of several upon a bush instead of singled out and appreciated in the small space of time in which to bloom? The bush will bloom more flowers but this one particular flower has only a small time in which to shine.” I found this as thought provoking as the original question,  and a bit telling.  So I responded…”While that is true, most do focus on the ways that they are different.  To their own detriment.  The question was what a rose would say. I have always thought it sad that to enjoy a flower we have to kill it. So i hear the sadness of it’s own imminent demise. I hear regret that the rose did not appreciate the beauty of being a part of the bush until the bush was no longer there.  Thus I hear loneliness.”
                       Now understand please that I do realize the fact that my response was slightly morbid. However her question wasn’t what we hear from the rose’s unique beauty. It wasn’t what does the rose symbolize.  So I spoke what I feel any living thing would feel as they die. Death is usually a morbid topic.
                    As to her statement about being just another on the bush? Well have you ever seen a rose bush up close?  No two roses are exactly alike.  So it is a riotous community of individuality. I lived in a place once with three bushes. They were amazing. I admit the question and resulting conversation was an inspiration for me. So i did what my weird little poetic heart does. I did another poem for my latest volume.  And because I can,  I am sharing it with you…..

The voice of a rose

The voice of the rose
Depends on the ear
That hears and it’s
point of view.

The choice of a
Listening heart,
As to hear such
As sadness, 
Adventure or
romantic speech.

None less valid,
Each in their own
Way right.

For why can
The voice of the rose
Not be as complex
as the Heart of man.

*her rose*

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*I found this one on Google. *

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Insomnia demons and insisting muses.

                         Okay,  i am often treated to bouts of insomnia.  The reasons vary. Often it is just not being able to quiet my busy mind. Last night was the first time in over a month. I am up to thirty three poems out of the seventy I do in each volume for Life drops. I will likely share later one from that. I spent some time writing on the d20 game world that I have created. Lots of details still to do on that one. Managed about two fifty on my steampunk story, and another hundred and fifty on my drow novel. Didn’t get to the others. Helped my sister’s faeries do some for their Facebook page. Shared what i found worthwhile to my author page,  to my shop page,  and to my personal page. Still felt like I should have gotten more done.  Didn’t get my crafts done yesterday.  Still my mind isn’t slowing.  Have cut way back on caffeine.  Limiting myself to two cups of coffee a week and pretty much no pop. Heck even my tea is mostly herbal anymore.  Still there are days when i can’t sleep.  I’m about to try again for st least a short nap.  So until I return…. may you sleep well and have only sweet dreams.

Slacker no longer

                 I finally have my kindle set up, mostly. Minor tweaks will always be there… but I’m finally where i have all my writing apps back. Don’t get me wrong,  I can write on paper,  or on the ancient laptop we have…still for me, i do my best on a touch screen tablet. So I was slacking on my daily writing. Even though I know better, I allowed myself to excuse the lack of word count by counting the days until my fire would be in my hot little hands. Not that there has been nothing from me, the latest volume of poetry is two closer to done. I have been assisting my sister with her faeries. (And working on a faery cookbook with her). I have done blogs (although not as many ). Still I am enforcing a two hour a day writing time from now on. And until my  vendor show (in Keyser, wv on May 14th) i will be setting aside an hour a day  for crafting.
                I know i will have at least something ready for publication by December. (There may be another children’s book sooner. Depending on how things go.) Seems like my biggest issue isn’t the writing…. lol. It is the procrastinating. 

Life is all about change

                    I got a kindle fire today. Up till now I’ve always used android devices.  Admittedly I avoided apple products because of the disturbing proprietary nature of their devices. Amazon’s Kindle fire tablet has many of the same flaws.  It is a flaw in computers and tablets. You are required to use a certain set of programs or apps depending on who puts out the device.  Android and Linux are the most flexible in this,  but even they have their limits.  I was asked why I chose a Kindle fire instead of a cheap android.. well the answer is in order to be sure that even half of my apps would work I would need a device well over a hundred dollars.  This tablet which i could verify at least half would work on, only cost $65.  So i went with the lesser evil. However it is a painful change.  As nothing Google works on this.  So i have lost my Google maps, and the luxury of Google docs.  It means no chrome or Google search.  Amazon truly set this up for a consumer as there is less ability to personalize it..All of my lovely Widgets are unusable. So while I do love this tablet,  I mourn the usability that a pricier tablet may have provided.

Dodging the dust today

Some days it feels like I have too many plates spinning. Hence the Picture above. (credit goes to Jim Hunt Illustrations…for the awesome image.)  Today was no exception. Somehow all those various hats….(mother, Writer, adult, Social media guru, blogger, Friend, Girlfriend, cook, gamer, etc, etc) all seemed to fit. I kept moving and I got stuff done. Even found time to watch a favorite movie with my little girl. Somedays it feels like the dust settles over me. creating a blanket. making it hard to move. Not today. Today I wasn’t sitting long enough for the dust to settle. Today I kept on my feet and managed to get things done. I maybe didn’t do as much in crafts as i did in writing, or maybe I was less attentive to this part of my life as I was to that. Still no broken plates. How about you? Any broken plates today? Did the dust settle? If so that is okay. Tomorrow you can try again.

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He always seemed to be a mark that poets of my generation were expected to try for. While I enjoy his work, I found others who touched my soul more.

Posted by Patricia Harris, Author on Thursday, March 24, 2016