Why do we grow out Of saying the most fun Things that can come to mind?
Hurry up and save the toothbrush, Avoid the trip to the planet Made of stench and stinky feet… Be made of turtles if you need to. Why did you stop talking to The monsters in the closet anyway?
Kids understand the world, The wonders that keep it alive… So though they say some of The strangest things, I think the kids see more than Anyone else does in a lifetime.
*Poet’s note. This is absolutely inspired by my friend Jenny’s Dante. She messaged me three things that he said and it reminded me of the moments when my kids were little…and I realized that kids have a magic that we tend to forget by the time adulthood comes.
34 felony counts and still allowed to be the republican nominee for president. He cannot even vote but he could be elected president?
40+ Anti trans bills – just in Missouri.
And that was just what filtered through social media.
There was more but I am trying to not bring others down to the level I am finding myself. I don’t like what humanity is becoming.
The urge to become the witch in the woods grows greater with each passing day.
So I have buried myself in books. Reading because I have been unable to write all week. Instead of Artsy fartsy thursday I think I will tell you about the three lovely books I have gotten to read recently.
Everyone is so busy building walls that we forget the reasons why we try to hide within.
Keeping your heart from feeling, keeping it from breaking, is safer than trying to live don’t you know?
building walls in front of my dreams stops the pain from ever entering, it stops people from touching the tender places that I can’t heal from the other hands that left me broken.
When you feel that rage (When you feel that) When you feel that rage
We’re the underdogs roaming in the dark We’re the savages born from worlds apart Our past has shown just how we bleed A blind future in front of me Lost and fractured to the point of break
So come and play with that rage (that rage) Light a match and reignite the flames (the flames) This ain’t the end, we’re here to stay We rush into the unknown Fearless and brave So don’t throw it away (that rage) Won’t stop until sweet victory
We’ve been working towards the goal for most our lives Every challenge that we faced, we have survived Our confidence is growing everyday Finally it is our time to reign
Our past has shown just how we bleed A blind future in front of me Lost and fractured to the point of break
So come and play with that rage (that rage) Light a match and reignite the flames (the flames) This ain’t the end, we’re here to stay We rush into the unknown Fearless and brave So don’t throw it away (that rage) Won’t stop until sweet victory
We’re the underdogs roaming in the dark We’re the savages born from worlds apart And now I know that this is just the start We will fight for everything we are RAGE, that RAGE (when you feel that rage, when you feel that) RAGE, that RAGE (when you feel that rage, when you feel that) Rage (that rage) Light a match and reignite the flames (the flames) This ain’t the end, we’re here to stay We rush into the unknown Fearless and brave So don’t throw it away (that rage) Won’t stop until sweet victory We will go down in history So come and play with that rage (that rage)
My 2 Cents –
too many people consider Rage as a variety of anger. Rage is so much more. and at the same time is. Rage is unconscious, uncontrollable, the first instinct when we get backed into a corner…. and yes it is anger, but it is also so much more.
I was once told that I should not be angry about the abuse that I suffered… I was told that I should forgive.
Anger is a safety mechanism. forgiving allows you to forget about the pain caused. It means letting go of righteous pain. that righteous pain built me into the person that I am. it made me empathetic, it made me kind, and it made me aware of the people that exist in this world who are going to hurt others.
I wake up every morning with my head up in a daze I’m not sure if I should say this, fuck, I’ll say it anyway Everybody tries to tell me that I’m going through a phase I don’t know if it’s a phase, I just wanna feel okay, yeah
I battle with depression, but the question still remains Is this post-traumatic stressing or am I suppressing rage? And my doctor tries to tell me that I’m going through a phase Yeah, it’s not a fucking phase, I just wanna feel okay, okay?
Yeah, I struggle with this bullshit every day And it’s probably ’cause my demons simultaneously rage It obliterates me, disintegrates me, annihilates me
‘Cause I’m about to break down, I’m searching for a way out I’m a liar, I’m a cheater, I’m a non-believer I’m a popular, popular monster I break down, falling into love now with falling apart I’m a popular, popular monster
I think I’m going nowhere like a rat trapped in a maze Every wall that I knock down is just a wall that I replace I’m in a race against myself, I try to keep a steady pace How the fuck will I escape if I never close my case?
Oh my God, I keep on stressing, every second that I waste Is another second sooner to a blessing I won’t take But my therapist will tell me that I’m going through a stage Yeah, it’s not a fucking stage, I just wanna feel okay, okay
Motherfucker, now you got my attention I need to change a couple things ’cause something is missing And what if I were to lie? Tell you everything is fine Every single fucking day I get closer to the grave, I am terrified
I fell asleep at the wheel again Crashed my car just to feel again It obliterates me, disintegrates me, annihilates me
‘Cause I’m about to break down, I’m searching for a way out I’m a liar, I’m a cheater, I’m a non-believer I’m a popular, popular monster I break down, falling into love now with falling apart I’m a popular, popular fucking monster
Yeah, here we go again, motherfucker, oh We’re sick and tired of wondering Praying to a god that you don’t believe We’re searching for the truth in the lost and found So the question I ask is Oh, where the fuck is your god now?
‘Cause I’m about to break down, I’m searching for a way out I’m a liar, I’m a cheater, I’m a non-believer I’m a popular, popular monster I break down, falling into love now with falling apart I’m not a popular, popular monster
I’m a liar, I’m a cheater, I’m a non-believer I’m a popular, popular monster
My 2 Cents –
There is something awful about this process. That loss of faith. In God, In community, In Self. And it is worse when you are being told that there is something wrong with you at the same time. There is not a damn thing wrong with being a monster. Be a monster, be yourself, Be Unique (10 points if you know where that is from)
Who will save you? The voices want to end me With words just like a blade Cutting pieces from me ‘Til nothing remains, ’til I go insane Eyes in the mirror that cannot be mine Beggin’ this stranger, “Get out of my mind” Fear overcomes me when I realize It’s only me I keep on screamin’, “Help!” I cannot breathe, someone save me from this hell Trapped in this fight, all I can find is myself Alone in my mind, demons come to life (who will save you?) And over time, demons come to life Masters of seduction And I like how they dance Feeding my addiction I play their game, another hit of pain Eyes in the mirror that cannot be mine Beggin’ this stranger, “Get out of my mind” Fear overcomes me when I realize It’s only me I keep on screaming, “Help!” I cannot breathe, someone save me from this hell Trapped in this fight, all I can find is myself Alone in my mind, demons come to life (who will save you?) And over time, demons come I’m not well, I wish I was happy The world can’t help, ’cause this storm’s inside me Still, I try, I’m tryin’ to change But there’s something broken, fucked up in my brain Partum my demons, there’s no reason Part of me wants to be stuck in this dream, and I can’t save me I can’t save me (Who will save you?) I can’t save me (Who will save you?) I can’t I keep on screaming, “Help!” (Who will save you?) I cannot breathe, someone save me from this hell (who will save you?) Trapped in this fight, all I can find is myself (who will save you?) Alone in my mind (in my mind), demons come to life (who will save you?) And over time, demons come to life Who will save me when demons come to life? (Who will save you?) Who will save me when demons come to life? (Who will save you?) Who will save me? (When demons come to life) When demons come to life I’m not well, I wish I was happy (wish I was happy) Demons come to life
My 2 Cents –
this is a hard time of year for my mental health. my birthday is the 13th and I am still trying to figure out how I managed to live this long.
Save me a place In the heart of your hearts When you think of love Never forsake me
Wanting and dreaming you Each time I think of you Lying naked beside me
Only a Lady of Dreams She will bring magic To sing to your heartstrings
Only a Lady of Dreams Come alive, you are all That I desire
Save me a place In the heart of your hearts When you think of dreams Never forsake me
Wanting and holding you Each time I come to you Lying naked beside you
Only a Lady of Dreams Could there be magic To sing to your heartstrings
Only a Lady of Dreams Come alive, you are all That I desire
Something tells me This is love that surrounds Only a fool Without wisdom can see Blind as I am In your eyes My Lady of Dreams
Blind as I am In your eyes My Lady of Dreams
Save me, save me A place in your heart Tears escape from me When we’re apart Please dream of me now My Lady of Dreams
My thoughts and wishes Are all the surrounds Mysteries hold you Then fly you away You know you are my life My Lady of Dreams
You know you are my life My Lady of Dreams
Save me a place In the heart of your heart When you think of love Never forsake me
Wanting and dreaming you Each time I think of you Lying so naked beside me
Only a Lady of Dreams Could there be magic To sing to your heartstrings
Only a Lady of Dreams Come alive, you are all That I desire
Something tells me This is love that surrounds Only a fool Without wisdom can see Blind as I am In your eyes My Lady of Dreams
Blind as I am In your eyes My Lady of Dreams
My 2 Cents –
My cousin asked for suggestions on how to get a child to sleep through the night. One of her friends is struggling with it, and I recommended the music of Kitaro. Most of their music is instrumental. My daughter loved it when she was little. The recommendation caused me to want to hear old favorites again. This particular song is sung by Jon Anderson from Yes. It is the only non Instrumental in their discography. They are a Japanese band. The music is quite soothing.
Down down down down down down down Down down down down down down down I’m gonna burn it down Down down down down down down down Down down down down down down down I’m gonna burn it down Down down down down down down down
9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1, fun I’m crawling through the doggy door My key don’t fit my lock no more I’ll change the drapes I’ll break the plates I’ll find a new place Burn this fucker down Down down down down down down down
I’m crawling through the doggy door My key don’t fit my lock no more I’ll change the drapes I’ll break the plates I’ll find a new place Burn this fucker down Down down down down down down down
Funhouse But now it’s full of evil clowns It’s time to start the countdown I’m gonna burn it down down down I’m gonna burn it down Down down down down down down down 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1
I’m gonna burn it down Down down down down down down down Down down down down down down down I’m gonna burn it down Down down down down down down down I’m gonna burn it down Down down down down down down down
My 2 Cents –
There have been a couple of occasions that I have felt like this. One of my writing groups imploded, a friend group fell apart. I think it is a common feeling. Where you just wanna go yeah I am out. it’s been fun, but I can’t no more. And Pink says it with a catchy beat.
And yeah I know I should do one more Halloween tune for this is HALLOWEEN! Meh….
Pattimouse 