Personally, I write Free Verse. My reason is simple… I hate dealing with the rules. Other forms require the poet to be aware of syllables or the syntax of the poem. Some require certain rhyme schemes.
I’m working on a volume of poetry entirely done with forms other than free verse – Xactly Poetic.
I am so frustrated with it at the moment. I am at 60 poems. I started with the idea that I was going to do 50… realized that I was being lazy because I always do 70 poems in each volume and I got mad at me.
So I am going to do 70. But it is not as easy as it is for the regular volumes. And I am irritated with myself for wanting to quit.
I have set a self imposed deadline/release date of September 15… that is a I have to get it done and published by that date. Which means I have to get it written by August 15. And I have 10 poems left to write. Ugh. Not normally a problem… so I am hoping that I can get it done.
Well the key to my survival Was never in much doubt The question was, how I could keep sane Trying to find a way out? Things were never easy for me Peace of mind was hard to find And I needed a place where I could hide Somewhere I could call mine I didn’t think much about it ‘Til it started happening all the time Soon I was living with the fear everyday Of what might happen that night I couldn’t stand to hear the crying Of my mother, and I remember when I swore that that would be the last they’d see of me And I never went home again They say that time is a healer And now my wounds are not the same I rang the bell with my heart in my mouth I had to hear what he’d say He sat me down to talk to me He looked me straight in the eyes He said “You’re no son, you’re no son of mine” “You’re no son, you’re no son of mine” “You walked out, you left us behind” “And you’re no son, you’re no son of mine” Oh, his words how they hurt me, I’ll never forget it And as the time, it went by, I lived to regret it “You’re no son, you’re no son of mine” But where should I go and what should I do? “You’re no son, you’re no son of mine” But I came here for help, oh I came here for you Well the years they passed so slowly I thought about him everyday What would I do, if we passed on the street Would I keep running away? In and out of hiding places Soon I’d have to face the facts We’d have to sit down and talk it over And that would mean going back They say that time is a healer And now my wounds are not the same But I rang that bell with my heart in my mouth I had to hear what he’d say He sat me down to talk to me He looked me straight in the eyes He said “You’re no son, you’re no son of mine” “You’re no son, no son of mine” “When you walked out, you left us behind” “And you’re no son, you’re no son of mine” Oh, his words how they hurt me I’ll never forget it And as the time, it went by I lived to regret it “You’re no son, you’re no son of mine” But where should I go and what should I do? “You’re no son, you’re no son of mine” Well I came here for help, oh I was looking for you “You’re no son, you’re no son of mine oh” “You’re no son” ha yeah, ha yeah, ha yeah, ha yeah, ha yeah “You’re no son, you’re no son of mine” Oh, oh Oh, oh Oh, oh Oh, oh Oh, oh Oh, oh Oh, oh You’re no son of mine (oh, oh) (Oh, oh) You’re no son of mine (oh, oh) You’re no son (oh, oh), you’re no son of mine (oh, oh) Oh, oh Oh, oh Oh, oh You’re no son of mine (oh, oh) Oh, oh Oh, oh Oh, oh Oh, oh Oh, oh Oh, oh Oh, oh
My 2 Cents –
This is a song that caught my attention in high school. It sparked my empathy then, and really still does. Not all survivors of abuse are the same, but we all know what it feels like…
Captain Planet, Arab Spring, L.A. riots, Rodney King Deep fakes, earthquakes, Iceland volcano Oklahoma City bomb, Kurt Cobain, Pokémon Tiger Woods, MySpace, Monsanto, GMOs
Harry Potter, Twilight, Michael Jackson dies Nuclear accident, Fukushima, Japan Crimean Peninsula, Cambridge Analytica Kim Jong Un, Robert Downey Jr., Iron Man
We didn’t start the fire It was always burning since the world’s been turning We didn’t start the fire No, we didn’t light it, but we’re trying to fight it
More war in Afghanistan, Cubs go all the way again Obama, Spielberg, explosion, Lebanon Unabomber, Bobbitt, John, bombing Boston Marathon Balloon Boy, War on Terror, QAnon
Trump gets impeached twice, Polar bears got no ice Fyre Fest, Black Parade, Michael Phelps, Y2K Boris Johnson, Brexit, Kanye West and Taylor Swift Stranger Things, Tiger King, Ever Given, Suez
We didn’t start the fire It was always burning since the world’s been turning We didn’t start the fire No, we didn’t light it, but we’re trying to fight it
Sandy Hook, Columbine, Sandra Bland and Tamir Rice ISIS, LeBron James, Shinzo Abe blown away Meghan Markle, George Floyd, Burj Khalifa, Metroid Fermi paradox, Venus and Serena
Oh-oh-oh, Michael Jordan, 23, YouTube killed MTV SpongeBob, Golden State Killer got caught Michael Jordan, 45, Woodstock ’99 Keaton, Batman, Bush v. Gore, I can’t take it anymore
We didn’t start the fire It was always burning since the world’s been turning We didn’t start the fire No, we didn’t light it, but we’re trying to fight it
Elon Musk, Kaepernick, Texas failed electric grid Jeff Bezos, climate change, white rhino goes extinct Great Pacific Garbage Patch, Tom DeLonge and aliens Mars rover, Avatar, self-driving electric cars SSRI’s, Prince and The Queen die World trade, second plane, what else do I have to say?
We didn’t start the fire (we didn’t start it) It was always burning since the world’s been turning (oh) We didn’t start the fire (we didn’t start it) But when we are gone, it will still go on (oh-yeah)
And on, and on, and on, an on And on, and on, and on We didn’t start the fire (fire) It was always burning since the world’s been turning
My 2 Cents –
I’m Gen X. That damn song is practically the anthem of my generation. And it’s been updated with this cover. It breaks my heart. But it is so freaking right.
I looked at the publication list and I realized that as of August I have 9 separate books personally (with One of them being Serena’s) published this year. And I know that I will be doing at least one children’s book in December.
Some years I barely manage to get 3 books ready for publishing.
I am not sure what the productivity streak has been caused by, but I am so very happy about it.
I believe it is time to order a new keyboard. I am hard on mine. Mostly due to gaming, but I do a lot of typing as well. The only requirement I have for my keyboard is it has to be backlit…and it has to have the number pad.
This is the one I settled on. I hope it is more sturdy.
What makes a good title? and is it subjective? My daughter and friend both think I can do better for my coloring book than the title I had chosen. I am still struggling with the amount of work that goes into what will be listed as a low content item. I am struggling with the coloring book altogether if I am honest.
I love the cover I made for it. But I don’t like how the scanned art has a off shade to it that will print funny. Or just the way that putting the book together for this is. I suppose I am finding fault with the whole project. I am a perfectionist and there is nothing perfect about this project.
For the ones that follow me on Facebook, I just changed my profile picture back to this one. It is a good picture, in my opinion. But I had a good friend tell me I should smile more… I am far prettier when I smile…. well I am smiling in this picture. But it doesn’t reach my eyes. Because I was nervous when I took the picture, the smile is a plastic thing. Forced for the picture. My grandma Ethel used to tell me that she hated my pictures because the smile never reached my eyes. This picture fits that discription.
I don’t want to be pretty. I don’t care if anyone sees me as such. However it was bugging me that she said that I should smile, as I was smiling. That is when I remembered what Grandma said. I still think it’s a good picture. I feel like I am androgynous in it. Which I love. I don’t really understand a lot about gender and the binary of it. But I don’t have to. I can be comfortable with myself and not really understand what I am.
I have this year struggled to find a therapist. I wish I could say it is all my doing that is causing this disconnect. At least then I could point the finger and go…This is what I need to fix. I wish I could just heal my mind and never need therapy again. (I literally just had a therapist accuse me of wanting to be broken because it was all I have ever known. I can’t even explain to her what damage she added to me.)
Some days are better than others.
Some days I fight and find myself actually happy. I enjoy the moments that life gives me…I enjoy the people I love. I enjoy the moments where I do something and it feels like I am doing it right.
The problem is those moments are not as often as I need them to be.
The other problem is I don’t have the people I need to share those moments with.
I have friends. I have family. I just don’t want to bother them. So I am lonely. In the fishbowl of the internet.
Today…
Perhaps I am a little more willing to show the vulnerability, and say that having mental health issues sucks.
Pattimouse 