Category: opinions

Social Media isn’t social anymore 

I  get on social media to enjoy the random bits of people that they choose to share. Then there are moments that ruin the whole experience for me. And I find myself wondering why I keep going back. The idea behind social media is wonderful… but the concept falls through thanks to human nature.  Instead of compassion and attention,  social media promotes discord and self absorption.

                       If I like too much of what is posted by someone then I am stalking their page. If I post a disagreement then I am disagreeing with every thing they post. And if I ask to be asked before being added to another group then I am ignored. I am back to wondering if it isn’t more trouble to be social than it is worth. I guess that is just me being grouchy….but I feel that there should be a middle ground. 

Speaking out and why

        Those who know me know I am a very outspoken person. I try to be as honest as possible. Mostly because my memory is awful,  i really would forget the lie. Easiest way to end up caught. There are topics I voice that I know make some uncomfortable. I refuse to be silenced because what I have to say makes any one feel bad.  I was told I was lying when i first spoke my truth.  Others suffered because of this.  I was sexually abused. I was terrified of my abuser doing exactly what he threatened to do. So it took time after to speak. He told me no one would believe me. They proved him right.  I was thirteen years old when I finally found the courage.  So he was allowed to continue his life,  and I was thought insane.  He did to others what was done to me.  They were heard and believed. He has been in jail for about six years now.

I speak now to take back my power.
I speak now because I believe the truth should be heard.
I speak now for those who may find comfort in my story.
I speak now because I survived. 
I speak now because no one should feel insane for telling their story.
I speak now so that my abuser and those like him never win.

Personal safety

                In a time of such marvelous inventions coming out,  I am appalled by how many are designed to protect women from assault. Now don’t misunderstand. I am not saying women should be raped. I am not saying that the inventions are bad. I merely am appalled by the need for such items. I am a survivor.  So I taught my children personal space and responsibility.  I taught my son to respect women.  I taught my daughter that her body is hers, and no one has the right to touch her without her permission. Yet, I know that there are people out there who would anyway. It kills me to know that someday she will not be safe. I am allowed the sadness that the world is not a safe place.  I asked her what she would do if someone tried to grab her, tried to force her to do things against her will, and my beautiful twelve year old girl said ” I will kick him in the leg, then the nuts and I will scream! ” While crass, it feels good to know she won’t be a easy target. She doesn’t separate.  If it’s someone she knows who tries to force her to do things or a stranger. Her body is hers. And I have made sure she knew it.  I cannot help wondering if more children of both genders were taught that concept how the statistics of sexual assault and abuse would be? After all abusers seduce.  They convince the child that even though the child is not comfortable with what is being done,  that it is something the abuser is allowed to do. I mourn the need for the devices to “prevent ” sexual assault because I believe that if as children we are taught not to do or allow certain behavior… well as adults it wouldn’t happen. At least not as often.  The ones who did at that point would be seen as deviants.  They would then be treated as the criminals that they are.

Originally written to respond to status on Facebook.

Since you see the darkness
that surrounds,
Your eyes are wide.
But in your disdain
You judge…
Not that I think you wrong,
Yet still it seems that
Judgment taints you.

Paints you,
With a brush of hatred formed.
See their actions
And look away,
For sadly you may
Never understand
That which drives them
To hate.

Hide disdain and sneering glares,
For tis themselves
Their hate brings down.
You are better
For not being involved,
For not allowing yourself
To them to devolve.

Strong females to admire

                      I am one who leans towards a feminist bent in my point of view. Now saying that,  It isn’t because I hate men or any such crazy thing as that.  I merely think gender equality should be a duh statement. Part of this is because I am female.  Part is because I have a daughter.  Too often women are told that they should not be strong and independent.  Media has come along way in the last two decades.  There was so few in my late teens. When I was growing to adulthood there was Linda Carter as Wonder woman.  Really on television (unless you were into British tv) she was it.
                  However in the last few decades strong female roles have popped up all over the place.  My favorites (again limited to American television ) are Abby from Ncis, Bones from Bones, Abby from sleepy hollow,  Claire from Outlander, Clarke from the 100, Whiskey from the dollhouse,  Deanna Troi and Beverly Crusher from ST:NG, Ivanova from Babylon 5, Regina from Once upon a time. There are a few others,  but the principal ideas are there. Many of those are strong intelligent women trying to survive in what is traditionally men’s jobs. That is what I think of as a good female role. 
                      As a writer and a reader that is what I look for in my female  character development. What do you look for?  Which are your favorites on television?

Day 25

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Hmmm weird traits. I am not sure I have any.  Weird personality quirks and weird idioms,  perhaps.  But honestly I see there being nothing about myself that is truly weird.  I am unique.  Weird implies that there might be something wrong with any of my traits.  Nope. Unique.

Day twenty four

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Hmmm something I miss… cartoons.  Saturday mornings with cereal and early morning cartoons. The cartoons of today really are subpar. I have tried to introduce my daughter to the cartoons of my childhood,  but to be honest,  it really saddens me that cartoons are no longer like that.

Late night ponderings.

                  So. I am awake.  It happens. And oddly enough when it does I manage to do some of my best writings.  It’s like this is when my mind is clearest.  When I fight with the demon known as insomnia.  I already added two poems to my poetry W.i.p. and now I am going to ramble here. My thoughts are this….
                    Is social media truly being social?  We have been asking this question as a society for a while now.  These sites allow us to lie. To become people we wish we were. There is a serious issue there.  Still it also allows us to communicate with people who are so very far away.  It makes the world seem so much less.  It allows family and friends who are far away to connect it ways that would be impossible otherwise… but that’s not always a good thing.  I personally use it to promote my books and sell my crafts.  I use it to keep in touch with those who I have known and love. For me…the recluse writer…yes it is social activity.  However I am strange… what?  Did you really not know that?  Lol. What about you? What do you think?  Is social media truly being social?  I wonder for the non introverted people out there,  if social media is something else?  Perhaps it is tedious.  If so do you only do them for your family?  What is your reasons for being on them?  Which do you use? There are so many choices.

Day twenty three

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Oh well… this is a tough one. I am an oddball.  I really don’t dislike people  overall… not any more.  For me it is a case by case – moment to moment thing. So saying I dislike someone… well for me that means they are not family.  Blood doesn’t always mean family.

Day ten

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                 MANGO! It is stringy and tart. Generally it is overused and no where as good as other citrus options.