Category: Mental Health

Tuesday Tunes

A day for me to discuss music

Lyrics-

She never mentions the word “addiction”
In certain company
Yes, she’ll tell you she’s an orphan
After you meet her family
She paints her eyes as black as night now
Pulls those shades down tight
Yeah, she gives a smile when the pain come
The pain gonna make everything alright
Says she talks to angels
They call her out by her name
Oh yeah, she talks to angels
Says they call her out by her name
She keeps a lock of hair in her pocket
She wears a cross around her neck
Yes, the hair is from a little boy
And the cross is someone she has not met, not yet
Says she talks to angels
Says they all know her name
Oh yeah, she talks to angels
Says they call her out by her name
She don’t know no lover
None that I ever seen
Yeah, to her that ain’t nothin’
But to me, it means
Means everything
She paints her eyes as black as night now
She pulls those shades down tight
Oh yeah, there’s a smile when the pain comes
The pain gonna make everything alright, alright
She talks to angels
Says they call her out by her name
Oh, yeah, angels
Call her out by her name
Oh, angels
They call her out by her name
Oh, she talks to angels
They call her out, yeah, yeah
Call her out
Don’t you know that they
Call her out by her name?


My 2 Cents –

There is something I can’t help but find poetic about this song. It has been something that I have been unable to explain why I like it…but it also has been one that sings my own name.

Tuesday Tunes

A day for me to discuss music

Lyrics-

We know we should turn and just walk away
We can’t help, but cause more pain
Wounded more with every word that we say
The memories remain

Here we are
Once again
Questioning the end
Am I supposed to let you go?

Don’t tell me now that you hate me
For never letting go
Let there be no doubt
I can’t live my life without you

I close my eyes and still hear the screams
That would tear apart our world
I keep reliving everything
I can’t believe how much this hurts

Here we are
Once again
Still questioning the end
How can I let you go?

Don’t tell me now that you hate me
For never letting go
Let there be no doubt
I can’t live my life without you

Here we are
Once again
Still questioning the end
How can I let you go?

Don’t tell me now that you hate me
For never letting go
Let there be no doubt
I can’t live my life without you

Don’t tell me now that you hate me
Because I don’t want to let you go
It’s like living hell
For me to live my life without you, oh-oh-oh

Oh-oh-oh
Oh-oh-oh
Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh
Oh-oh-oh
Oh-oh-oh
Oh-oh-oh
Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh
Oh-oh-oh

Oh-oh-oh
Oh-oh-oh
Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh
Oh-oh-oh
Oh-oh-oh
Oh-oh-oh
Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh
Oh-oh-oh


My 2 Cents –

so I am looking forward to going to a concert on the 15th of February. Disturbed and Falling in Reverse and Plush. so I have been listening to the first two of the 3 bands a lot more often because of that. Disturbed just dropped this new song. so I have to share my joy.

Tuesday Tunes

A day for me to discuss music

Lyrics-

You can tell me that you try
But you told me as you said goodbye
And all those things you couldn’t say
You just watched me walk away, again
But I was there for you to the end
As your lover and your best friend
So why’d you cross that line and destroy my life?
Please just tell the truth
‘Cause it’s a lot to defend and I can’t understand
How I’m still loving you
Why can’t you be by yourself?
Always needing to be with someone else
So uncomfortable in your own skin
I didn’t realize that time alone meant time with him
So why’d you cross that line and destroy my life?
Please just tell the truth
‘Cause it’s a lot to defend and I can’t understand
How I’m still loving you
We only have one life to get right
We had our second chance
And yet we fucked it up again
So why’d you cross that line and destroy our lives?
Please just tell the truth
It’s a lot to defend, I can’t understand
How I’m still loving you
How am I still loving you?


My 2 Cents –

Someone pointed out that the song I shared last week and this one when played together form a story – no matter what order you play them. I felt that and found the story too compelling to not share.

Tuesday Tunes

A day for me to discuss music

Lyrics-

When you imagine a prisoner of war, is this what you imagine?



“Under Your Scars” lyrics
Godsmack Lyrics
Play “Under Your Scars”
on Amazon Music Unlimited (ad)
“Under Your Scars”

Do we make sense? I think we do
In spite of everything that we’ve been through
Oh when you say black and I say white
It’s not about who’s wrong as long as it feels right
Don’t think those stars won’t align

Under your scars I pray
You’re like a shooting star in the rain
You’re everything that feels like home to me, yeah
Under your scars, I could live inside you time after time
If you’d only let me live inside of mine
Live inside of mine

Wish you were here right beside me
So I could watch you sleep
Hold your body closer, breathe you deep
And everything feels broken when you’re not next to me
Would you still be you if we weren’t we?

Under your scars I pray
You’re like a shooting star in the rain
You’re everything that feels like home to me, yeah
Under your scars, I could live inside you time after time
If you’d only let me live inside of mine

So hey, if you feel like coming down
If you feel like coming around
Just call my name out loud, na, na, na
Hey, if you feel like coming down
If you feel like coming around
Just call my name out loud, na, na, na, hey

Under your scars I pray
You’re like a shooting star in the rain
You’re everything that feels like home to me, yeah
Under your scars, I could live inside you time after time
If you’d only let me live inside of mine
Live inside of mine


My 2 Cents –

so I think I probably had something witty here…but in trying to get the posts done for the upcoming week I ended up sending it to the ether. However I planned on the song being here for the next week’s Tuesday tunes to reference… so I have to leave the mess up.

Setting A Goal

So, I have set up a goal of publishing Tears of the Broken in March. That means I have to get it written by no later than the middle of February. It’s about half done. So I might be able to get it done. I already have the next volume chosen – I know I usually ask for your opinion…but I have it calling to me. I will celebrate getting this one done by announcing that one.

Tuesday Tunes

A day for me to discuss music

Lyrics-

I saw somebody leap to the other world

Jumping off the edge left behind his hope

But he could fly for a second incredible

I wonder what it was like when he finally fell


They say you hit the water and then it’s gone

All the tears you cried all the pain you felt

But is it worth all the hurt that you’ve probably caused

When they find that you don’t make it back to shore


To be honest

Sometimes I think about all of the same things

I wish I could go back so I could change all of my memories

‘Cause all of them are sad

All the drinks I had

Turned into a pool of misery

I wonder if I’m better drowning


I tell myself

No no no no no no no no

No

I try to tell myself

No no no no no no no no

No


They celebrate the life that they never knew

Can’t point out the elephant in the room

Most people can’t understand what you’re going through

So in the end does it matter the path you choose?


To be honest

Sometimes I feel like I’m feeling the same things

I wish there was a way that I could tell this to my family

But they’d only be sad

Maybe I don’t have

Any point in being here

It’s so unclear if I’m swimming or sinking


I tell myself

No no no no no no no no

No

I try to tell myself

No no no no no no no no

No


I’ll turn my headlights on

Speeding ‘cross the bridge

No it won’t be long

But I got to be strong


And I tell myself

No no no no no no no no

I gotta tell myself

No no no no no no no no


And I tell myself

No no no no no no no no

I gotta tell myself

No no no no no no no no


I tell myself


My 2 Cents –

Sometimes we have to tell ourselves… and find the strength to hear.

Feeling like I did Something

Well…I finished writing Queer Verbage which will not release until April…it seems so far away…but it is one less thing I have hanging over me. I can do the formatting and get the stuff done for publishing.
I cannot explain why the need to finish it was so strong, but having it done is a weight off. Now I have Tears of the Broken, Dream Drops, Fighting Ignorance, Ocular Dystopia, Occult Madness in progress for me and Chasing Ghosts for Serena.
When I mentioned to my Daughter how I felt like I was struggling with it, she said I was pushing too hard. She said that if I worked any harder she would never get to see me. Sorry, she comes first there. But it did make me wonder…what is the right amount? I try to write as I feel the urge, but I also try to set a daily goal so I actually get forward progress on more than just the poetry volumes…because I tend to get easily distracted from my stories. I am aware there is a discipline to this…and I am a child of chaos.
So where is the happy medium for me? That is something I am going to be working with over the next few weeks. I need to set me a workable time schedule for writing and work that I can stick to…or at least attempt to. Let’s see how that goes?

Lifts when you least expect

So between the stress of the normal holidays and vehicle issues… I have been a little bit more than usual fighting with my internal demons. To the point where it has even interrupted the writing. Usually the fight feeds the writing…

I’m not sure what the difference is this year but I have been struggling. That being said… my friend Jenny Elliott – writer, and Fae Corps intern…chose the best way to cheer me up.

She has been reading my The Voices within volume. And she came to a poem and decided to tell me that I was more than enough.

Screenshot she sent me.

Then she has been busy with making marketing stuff for Fae Corps and I keep running across my books there.

Though I know it was a part of her job…it really does feel like I have made some difference in this world.

Sometimes we can’t see the world around us for the immediate struggle we are dealing with.

Remember you never know what your reviews will do for the author.

Tuesday Tunes

A day for me to discuss music

Lyrics-

No one knows just what has become of her
Shattered doll, desperate
Oh so innocent and delicate
But too damn obdurate
And obstinate to let go
Broken down, hurt again, it never ends
Frightened and trembling
Did she fall again? An accident?
Her eyes encircled in black again
I can’t believe that she’s still with him
For how long will you try?
How long until you walk away?
Your facade can’t disguise
The fact that you’re in misery
Look inside see what has become of her
Hiding within again
Can she pick herself up again?
It’s just too difficult and arduous to let go
Homicide flashes through her mind again
No more pain, take control
If he raises his hand again
She’ll find her freedom in killing him
The world will see that she’s had enough
For how long will you try?
How long until you walk away?
Your facade can’t disguise
The fact that you’re in misery
For how long will you try?
How long until you walk away?
Your facade can’t disguise
The fact that you’re in misery
For how long will you deny?
How long until you walk away?
Your facade can’t disguise
The fact that you’re in misery
For how long will you try?
How long until you walk away?
Your facade can’t disguise
The fact that you’re in misery
Broken down, hurt again
It never ends


My 2 Cents –

This song is often taken as speaking of an abused woman. I have always seen it as masking in any form. Being who you are not in any relationship is a torture. If you love someone, accept them for who they are. No matter what they are.

Tuesday Tunes

A day for me to discuss music

Lyrics-

Let nothing you dismay, remember that the sun returns upon the Solstice day! The growing dark is ended now, and Spring is on its way. O, tidings of Comfort and Joy… Comfort and Joy…O, tidings of Comfort and Joy. The winters worst still lies ahead fierce tempest snow and rain Beneath the blanket on the ground the spark of life remains.the sun’s warm Rays caress the seeds to raise life’s songs again.O, tidings of Comfort and Joy… Comfort and Joy…O, tidings of Comfort and Joy within the blessed apple lies the promise of the queen for from this pentacle shall rise orchards fresh and green. The earth shall blossom once again the air be sweet and clean..O, tidings of Comfort and Joy… Comfort and Joy…O, tidings of Comfort and Joy


My 2 Cents –

I went looking for holiday music and I found this treasure.