Saturday thoughts

Meme - Feeling Invisible

I will be going back to the other sort of Saturday post hopefully next week. I am feeling rotten, and the world just seems awful lately. So I thought I would again share my thoughts. (I did not get Saturday Scheduled ahead so this is a last minute scramble for a post as well)

This has been a rough week. Lots of Doctor visits and medical tests. I fell twice. And I feel like I got nothing done. Perhaps that is why I am doing the switch on the post. I need to feel like there is more to me than just what I get done.

I know how to do so many things. I can do resin crafts, sewing, Plastic Canvas, Needlepoint, Digital art, Coding in C++, Calligraphy, Acrylic and Watercolor Painting, Candlemaking, Soapmaking, Play Piano, Book binding, Offset Printing, First Aid, Graphic/Cover Design, basic jewelry design, metal working, wood working, Bread baking, Basic cooking, writing stories & poetry, Editing, and so much more. Still there are days when I feel like I am useless.

Why? because I couldn’t do the mamogram on the right side because of pain. Because my hands curl due to arthritis. Because I get so dizzy I randomly lose my balance. Because I legitimately forget to eat. I struggle to remember to take the pharmacy I am supposed to take twice a day. (20 pills in the morning, 18 pills at night, and a shot once a week) I either stay awake 3-4 days at a time or I sleep 24 hours straight. and I never feel rested. So I feel useless a lot. Am I? nah, but that doesn’t mean that feeling is any less. I didn’t even mention that I taught myself how to publish. I have taught myself most of the skills I have. The only “Talent” I have (An ability that I did not need to practice or study) is writing poetry…and even that I have improved by simply practicing. So if, like me, you are feeling useless….stop and list all that you know how to do. I believe it will help you feel better about you.

What a difference a day makes

Meme - Overthinking

So I shared a gofundme…and I still recommend it. My youngest will use whatever donations to find themselves a home. My own safety is no longer an issue here. Theirs is not either, but They are no longer happy here. Which is fine.

Mental health issues erupted in my home, and when I pushed back they nearly blew the whole thing to Hell. That has been addressed. Appologies made and conversations had that needed to be. However, I am going to be making changes for my own happiness here. There will be a new studio for my crafts, and an office for my book work. This will take time. But I am willing to work towards it.

What a week!

Meme - Not today

This has been a busy week.

I found out (thanks to one of my authors there) that the covers are not appearing on the sites for the indie bookstores in Canada. So I am working to get that fixed.

I have several books in the manuscript stage. This is where I am dealing with Formatting, editing and making sure that all the details are right before I publish them. Which is tiring all on it’s own.

I got distracted by a new story. I was doing well writing the Sea Wytch…but I got invited to submit to an anthology Fractured Mind Publishing is Doing…and it is out of my normal genre. And I am scared to death of messing it up…but I am enjoying the writing. It is flowing, and I am trying to make it work.

If I get accepted it will be a February release. I will be sure to post more on here as it is known to me. (of course this is a Serena thing.)

I wrote another Bedtime tales book for release next year. (That is a Patricia thing..)

And the poetry has been happening.

With all of that plus the normal publishing stuff…and the housekeeping that I have to try to keep up with…I am exhausted.

What a week!

Meme - Not today

okay, so I have overdone everything.

my body aches everywhere.

I have a few things that are still in the works, and I am not sure what I have that I can share about them.

I know I have to work on a million things… but it has been a long week.

So I don’t have any more spoons.

Wild Wednesday

Y’all. I have a new car!

I have wanted this car since I was 15 years old.

We only got it because the price was right. And we needed a vehicle that could hold the 3 of us.

But…

Still. It is a VW bug.

I’m a little bit giddy. It is seriously my dream car.

The bulbs for the low beams need replaced. There’s a crack in the windshield. The glovebox handle needs replaced. The door handle on the driver side needs replaced. The driver’s window sticks. The car is in serious need of cleaning. The exhaust needs replaced. It needs an oil change and a tune up.

We paid a thousand for it.

We are going to probably be a couple of months before we can afford to get it All repaired (as we have to pay the loan off we borrowed to buy it to begin with first.) But we own it.

Picture is from the ad- I have not been able to get some of it in person yet.

Of course, since I can’t afford to do anything else… I have been window shopping on Amazon for fun accessories for my new car. What do you do when you are excited for something and can’t do anything with it?

Updates, and ideas

Photo by Bich Tran on Pexels.com

So I asked a bit ago for ideas to improve my blog. I had someone choose to send their ideas privately,(Which I am fine with by the way), and I felt the ideas to be brilliant. I have tried to put as many in place as I could. I do not know if I have put them in play completely yet…I am still working on a few of them. It will likely be a work in progress for the next little bit. I am working on getting a routine in place. I want 2023 to be a year where I am organized and have an easier time keeping up with my writing and art. I want the blog to flow without hesitation…I know I don’t work that way…but I am always gonna try.

Those who have followed me for a while know I usually pick a word for each new year. One to be an example for what my goals/plan for the year will be. I think that I will be using a phrase for 2023. My phrase will be “Forward Movement”. The thought is even a baby step is forward movement. I spend too much time beating myself up for stuff that I don’t manage to get done. Things that fall through the cracks. This year I want to focus on the joy of life. The celebration of the things that I do get done. So, I am setting myself up for success.

Holiday, cold, and busy days

So I know that I have been awol for a couple of days. That is because of the above picture. My porch has been needing replaced for a few months…due to safety issues. We have been trying to get everyone together to get it done and the weather to cooperate. Yesterday and today has been a good shot… but I don’t do well with being out in the cold and working. so I have been unable to get the blog together. I have gotten the poem a day done but haven’t been able to get the image to the blog. I am so very thankful for my friends. Hopefully my porch will be done today. The holiday is likely to interrupt the posting. So I am planning on returning to this on Monday after the holiday. So I wish you all a happy Thanksgiving.

Running Late

Photo by Claudia Schmalz on Pexels.com

Okay so I am going to do a Poem today…but between the book release and dealing with the minutiae of last minute details for that…and the physical replacement of my porch I do not know if I will get it up here. I meant to have it done by now…but as the title suggests. I am running behind on what I needed to do. So I thought instead I would let you know I have been uploading (And trying to get organized) my poetry images on Pinterest. It is a work still in progress as there are limits to keep spam down on the site. So enjoy!

Btw the prompt today was to write a funny poem…I am struggling. my humor is often dark and off color…

Tuesday…what more can I say?

The last couple of days have been a whirling shitshow. I am completely out of my routine. Today I am dealing with an enormous amount of laundry…and the various dishes that are actually normal for my house. I am squeezing in doctors appointments and errands. I somehow want to attempt to write today. I am an ambitious soul after all. The end of the month is coming quite quickly, and I have two anthologies and an indie author publishing in October.

I am already preparing for kid’s week – The first week in December. We have books planned by A.R. Clayton, D.W. Storer, C.M. Snow, Raz T. Slasher, and 2 by me. (One picture book and one middle grade). I feel like It is going to be a good offering this year. The first Call is out for the spring anthology. And I have submitted a poem and a flash piece of Serena’s to various places. Some things are just falling into place. I will let you know as I hear about the submissions and the results there.

Late Again

Photo by Alina Blumberg on Pexels.com

I sometimes feel like Alice… the rabbit hurrying me for fear of being late. Admitted, I expected to be late for today. I was not in the mind space for blogging last night. To tell you the truth I am not quite there yet today. I survived the MRI. Though I was scared to death of it. This week I am going to be late if I post anything. I hate doing that but it has been a crazy week and it is only a Monday. I guarantee that I am not going to be able to do my blogging usual, but hopefully what I do post will be worth reading.

So, hurry hurry and let us see… what exactly the rabbit has in store for you and me.