Tag: Blogging

Layout is life draining

So, ink splashes is in review for the E-book formats. I have been working for the last hour to try to get the paperback settled. Ebook layout is so different than the paperback. It is just simple things that keep hanging up the process. You can literally have it perfect in a pdf or doc format and then when you check the preview it is not even close.

And as I was typing this I finally got the paperback into review. It generally takes 24-72 hours to get into published state. As soon as it is I will post release day links.

Now onto layout for Under the Mists.

Friday writing day

There is an abundance of writing tips on the net nowadays. It sometimes seems like everyone is a writer anymore. So many are offering the same advice over and over. I have been wracking my brain to make my writing posts more unique. (After all I want to give you a reason why my blog is worth your read.) I decided that writing advice should be in answer to questions asked. Prompts, while useful are often boring for me to write.

So I thought about how to fill this space. Yeah, I have topics that can be put on Friday. That is not the hard part. I think that I want to keep writing a Friday topic so to remind myself that I am more than just a poet or artist. Poetry, while a type of writing, has Monday.

My Tuesday post is now a set thing. I will be doing the Tuesday tunes thing from now on. Wednesday is for art. Thursday will be my random day. Friday is the hard one. I want to keep it mostly writing related. I will be doing prompts still. I will be doing reviews. I will be posting some stories and story ideas to see if they are worth doing. I may make posts about the technical snarls of writing, editing, and publishing. It should all fit nicely under the umbrella of Writing Day. I can add subtitles to clarify what each post is dealing with.

If any of you have questions about the writing process, indie publishing, editing, or anything else… Send me the question. I will do my best to see your questions answered. If I cannot personally answer it, I will try to find a guest blogger who can.

I am also thinking about adding to Monday. Doing something similar to what I did in April. Picking a favorite poet and talking about them and their poetry. Though I enjoy sharing my own poetry with you… Sometimes it feels like I am only feeding my own ego with this blog. I want to also teach, inform, and entertain.

Thursday Straight Talk (a day early)

Tw: mention of abuse, suicide, and rape.

I have ptsd. This is not something that I tend to talk about often because it has a stigma attached. I get claustrophobic. I hyperventilate. I dissociate. I struggle with the urge to hide. I am an insomniac. I am a survivor. None of the things I have listed make me a bad person. Most are the result of trauma and of keeping myself so hypervigilant for so long. I see a doctor. I take meds. Some days are better than others. I have learned coping methods. I have learned to be aware of my triggers. No I am not a snowflake. No I don’t have to have a safe place. I don’t even know what a safe place is. I take life one day at a time. I have panic moments as so many people do. They are from knowing that real monsters exist in this world. Monsters that hide in human skin. I am not suicidal. I really don’t want to die. However on my bad days I find that I wish I had never been born. I struggle with telling my story. I spoke my truth. I was called a liar. I came forward with one piece… And was not believed. I only told one person, because I was a child. If a child tells you their pain… Believe them. For you may be the only one they tell. My journey has been long. I was so fractured that I had at one point nearly 13 separate “alters” I am down to two. I used to have nightmares nightly. I am down to on average twice a month. Struggling with this does not make me less. I have come an amazingly long way… From losing months of time to now I lose an hour rarely. I am healing.

This is not something that I expected to post, if I am honest. I am careful about letting this all be “known” because I have others in my life that I know are embarrassed when the topic comes up. I have no reason for embarrassment. I am not ashamed of who I am. But, I love them. So I hold my tongue sometimes. However, I have been thinking about it. Perhaps it is not the right thing to do. I think that perhaps sharing the struggle might be more helpful for others who are struggling. I don’t know if I will share the details, yet.

I am a survivor of childhood sexual abuse. The man who did it abused others. He served time for one, and only one, of his victims. He has never been to court for what he did to me.

I survived a gang rape. And I survived another rape.

I survived domestic violence, by more than one of my relationships. My current love is the first time I have not been physically abused by the man in my life.

I have been homeless. I have been without food. I learned how to survive in each of these cases.

I have done things that I was not proud of. Hasn’t everyone? So, if I have a bad day… I might post some depression memes on social media. My poetry may get a bit darker. My art angrier.

Still. I survive. I am always here ready to listen. I understand what survival costs. Some days are better than others. Today I did not sleep. My mind would not quiet. Today my mind was attacking me with my faults in litany. Tomorrow may be better.

I know that this is published on Wednesday. I will post the art for Wednesday a day late because I think that this is important.

If you need support right now, call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255, the Trevor Project at 1-866-488-7386 or text “HOME” to 741-741. Head here for a list of crisis centers around the world.

If you or a loved one is affected by sexual abuse or assault and need help, call the National Sexual Assault Telephone Hotline at 1-800-656-4673 to be connected with a trained staff member from a sexual assault service provider in your area.

Writing Friday

Writing. Crap. What do I say? Do I sit here and try to explain that, at least for me, writing is something akin to breathing? That there’s never been a time when I didn’t need to put words together? And then I would have to tell you just how it feels to read what I wrote and think that I am not cut out for this. How many people who I know personally who are brilliant at this whole writing gig. Still… I would have to mention that the idea of stopping is actually painful. It has been how I was able to see the answers to life, since before I ever realized that there was a question.

Usually, I try to use the Friday post to give tips, and help with the whole writing and publishing thing. And I think that is great to keep the blog going… But today I was thinking about the reason why I write. Yeah… I could probably claim that I was trying to add beauty. But I don’t generally lie. My art is more how I do beauty. Abstract and pencil drawings to encourage happiness in the eye of the beholder. My children’s books are a way of connecting with my daughter, as they have thus far been stories I told her, or wrote for her. Serena’s stuff is stories that I want to read. But if I am honest with myself… My main writing is my poetry.

My poetry will never be hallmark stuff. My poetry is raw emotion and survival. I have lived a survivors life. My poetry is how I have been able to express myself even when my voice was stolen. I could write my story… Even though I was being told I lied. I could write it and it was accepted because it was poetry. It was written in a way that meant I was non-threatening to those who were part of hurting me. And it was written off as just an angsty teen writing depressing poetry… For don’t we all have that stage?

After I was free, and I was no longer needing verse to speak my truth, well it was still the easiest way to speak my pain. To spread my views. It was habit. I may never be able to sit along with the likes of Poe or Dickenson… But my words will remain. I will be there when another lost soul seeks to know that they are not alone.

Thursday Tea party

So, here we are again… Sugar? Cream? Oh my… Is there enough room for all of you to squeeze in?

Serena tells me that she has broken the block and is writing again on Life, guilt, and undeath. She apparently now knows how it will end. Here’s hoping that she finishes soon, as I can’t wait to read it.

My sister and I have started a publishing company. fae corps publishing will be releasing our first anthology in July. Under the mists will feature stories about the dark fae by some truly amazing authors. This has been an amazing journey. Serena has a story in there, along with five others. We are going to be spotlighting authors and artists on our blog. If we get enough submissions we will also do a quarterly Ezine.

I know that Dream Drips is still relatively new… But I am over halfway through the writing for Ink Splashes. I think that I will be releasing it in July. I might be mistaken… But it is something to keep an eye out for.

I have been accepted in the summer edition of Creatives Rising. My poem Serendipity will be included in there. The other creatives who are involved are so wonderful. I really am excited about this edition. I will be posting the subscribe link when they give it to me.. Watch for it.

If you are an indie artist or artist and want to be seen somewhere new go over to the Fae Corps blog and submit your work. We will be doing spotlights and posting poetry, short stories, art, and photgraphy that we feel shows the quality of indie work.

All in all it looks like the next couple of months are going to be fun. What do you have coming up? Anything fun?

Prompt me

So I have posted prompts for poetry before. Prompts are useful in all forms of creativity. It is the best way to Spark that muse for many.

There’s prompts for all of the writing styles out there. I have seen prompts for journal, journalism, short stories, dialogue, poetry, and characters. There is also prompts for art/sketchbooks.

Where do you find prompts? I find a lot on tumblr. There are blogs that post daily prompts. Pinterest is also a good place for this. I found several boards in a single search just today.

For me, prompts are not a guarantee that I will be inspired. It is like a focus, sometimes it will help me to see an idea… Others it is just words that don’t have any meaning. I used to turn my nose up at the idea of using prompts. It felt like I was cheating… After all, how is the idea mine if I am using prompts? It took me time to realize that the art, poetry, or writing is still mine. It is in how I handle the idea that makes it my own.

Time flies

Tuesday I did a “date” with my teenage daughter. This is time for her and I where she is the absolute center of my attention. Don’t get me wrong… She always has my attention. However, as mom, there is a million things that have my attention. Our dates are where dad, house, writing, and other assorted hats that I wear are thrown in the closet for the time we are together. This time we watched some television (her choice of shows) and made bath bombs.

Bath bombs are apparently more her craft than mine. She was brilliant with the crafting. Hers stayed together better, and generally were neater.

Making bath bombs were easy and fun. The recipe we used was:

1 cup baking soda

1/2 cup Epsom salts

1/2 cup citric acid

1/2 cup corn starch

1 tbsp water

1 tbsp mineral oil

1 tsp essential oil

4-6 drops food color

She made some neat variation in the color of the bombs. I only had picked up a very basic mold set as I was unsure whether or not we would enjoy it or not. She wants to continue with crafting them, so I have been eyeballing some other equipment on Amazon.

Y’all would not believe the mess this made. My dining room is covered in a layer of dust.

Black food coloring comes out a dark green.

You really have to put some pressure on the mold to get the bombs to hold together. There is a definite need for patience with this.

I was responsible for the “half ” bombs. One I made split after being set to the side to dry. The bombs need to sit for 48 hours to dry.

Mistakes were made. But isn’t that part of the fun?

The drying rack at the end of the making. All in all the bath bombs were not incredibly expensive to make. Walmart carries many of the supplies cheaply. It was a fun adventure with my girl.

Tuesday Tea Party

Hi all! Hopefully you had a good memorial day. I have a few announcements. And I am about to take a vacation… The first in years.

My first announcement is that I am going to be part of a new ezine/blog. We will be focusing on indie authors. We are going to accept submissions of stories, poetry, and art. It will be at faecorpspublishing. It is also the publishing house that we will be using to publish Under the mists anthology. We are looking at a July release of the anthology. I can tell you the stories in Under the mists are a wonderful read. We are already discussing what our next anthology topic will be.

My vacation is a roadtrip with my daughter. I will try to take pictures to share. I plan to visit my brother, meet my beautiful new grandson, visit my son, visit my dad, and see my babysitter. I haven’t seen my babysitter in 20+ years. She was a second mom when I was a kid. I am looking forward to the trip and the girl time with my teenager. We are going to start today by making bathbombs to take as gifts.

I plan to do some prescheduled posts for next week. However I cannot promise to do a daily post as I am busy packing for a trip that is longer than I have been on in twenty some years.

I hope that I will have a lot more to post about in the months ahead. Between the new publishing group and other upcoming events, I think that I will have much to share with you.

Insomnia attacks

Since I am sleep deprived and have no spoons to spare… Here is some poetry to make up for the lack of a post.