Decided, after getting irritated at a friend…to organize my files a bit. and I realized. some of my volumes have more shared than others…some have none shared. so I think I will in April do alternating posts. One of other poets poetry. and one of mine. There will be daily posts in April. There will not be my usual posts in April. That is all.
Lyrics
I hate the world today
You’re so good to me
I know but I can’t change
Tried to tell you
But you look at me like maybe
I’m an angel underneath
Innocent and sweet
Yesterday I cried
You must have been relieved
To see the softer side
I can understand how you’d be so confused
I don’t envy you
I’m a little bit of everything
All rolled into one
I’m a bitch
I’m a lover
I’m a child
I’m a mother
I’m a sinner
I’m a saint
And I do not feel ashamed
I’m your hell
I’m your dream
I’m nothing in between
You know you wouldn’t want it any other way
So take me as I am
This may mean you’ll have to be a stronger man
Rest assured that when I start to make you nervous
And I’m going to extremes
Tomorrow I will change
And today won’t mean a thing
I’m a bitch
I’m a lover
I’m a child
I’m a mother
I’m a sinner
I’m a saint
And I do not feel ashamed
I’m your hell
I’m your dream
I’m nothing in between
You know you wouldn’t want it any other way
Just when you think you’ve got me figured out
The season’s already changin’
I think it’s cool you do what you do
And don’t try to save me
I’m a bitch
I’m a lover
I’m a child
I’m a mother
I’m a sinner
I’m a saint
And I do not feel ashamed
I’m your hell
I’m your dream
I’m nothing in between
You know you wouldn’t want it any other way
I’m a bitch
I’m a tease
I’m a goddess on my knees
When you hurt
When you suffer
I’m your angel undercover
I’ve been numb
I’m revived
Can’t say I’m not alive
You know I wouldn’t want it any other way
My 2 Cents –
I am struggling with a migraine. It is a day before my 48th birthday. I want to be brave enough to have this kind of ballsy attitude…but most of the time…
Wednesday will likely not be a thing this week… I will try.
Wild Wednesday will return next week. I just didn’t get it done in the weekend and I am struggling with juggling the appointment calendar and my responsibilities. Add the fact that I am fairly certain that I have probably torn the rotator cuff… I am in pain and in general not feeling up to getting my stuff done today.
Lyrics
Theories, I know you got your theories
I know you got this feeling
Everyone’s out to get you (To get you)
Faceless, enemies always faceless
Somehow, you’re always blameless
But that don’t make you bulletproof (Bulletproof)
You hear whispers when we’re just talkin’
See pointin’ fingers
When we touch, yeah, when we touch
You hear footsteps when no one’s comin’
But you keep runnin’, there’s no use runnin’
You know you’re your own assassin
You don’t need no help with that
It’s your back that you been stabbin’
When you gonna understand?
You know you’re your own assassin
You don’t need no help with that
You know you’re your own assassin
You know you’re your own assassin
When did, when did you start pretendin’?
You don’t know why it ended
You think the fault is all mine (Is all mine)
Mirror, you never checked the mirror
Or you woulda seen the killer
Starin’ right back with your eyes (With your eyes)
You hear whispers when we’re just talkin’
See pointin’ fingers
When we touch, yeah, when we touch
You hear footsteps when no one’s comin’
But you keep runnin’ there’s no use runnin’
You know you’re your own assassin
You don’t need no help with that
It’s your back that you been stabbin’
When you gonna understand?
You know you’re your own assassin
You don’t need no help with that
You know you’re your own assassin
You know you’re your own assassin
You know you’re your own assassin (Assassin, assassin, assassin)
You know you’re your own assassin (Assassin, assassin)
You know you’re your own assassin (Assassin, assassin, assassin)
You know you’re your own assassin
You know you’re your own assassin
Ah, ah, ah, ah
You know you’re your own assassin
You don’t need no help with that
It’s your back that you been stabbin’
When you gonna understand?
You know you’re your own assassin
You don’t need no help with that
You know you’re your own assassin
You know you’re your own assassin
My 2 Cents –
Self sabotage… lately and the closer to my birthday it gets… the more I feel like I am fighting with this. I know that I am not the only one that struggles with this problem.
It’s Sunday. I usually do my publishing/blog/writing based responsibilities on Sunday… but it is also Joe’s birthday. So, I am squeezing in what I can before I go to bed. Then I will be spending the day with him and trying to get the rest of the week playing catch up. Next week I will be AWOL as the 13th is my day.
I actually have ideas for this week, mostly. Wednesday is the iffy…but I may come up with something by the time I get there.
If I find that I am feeling froggy I might try to do something after the 13th as far as posts but regardless I will return to work on the following week.
Also…in addition to my own release of Internal Battlefields, my middle child, NK Xero, is looking at releasing a poetry book in April. (With Fae Corps Publishing of course). Also I am hoping to do the same thing I usually do and post a daily poem. I’m hoping to try to do some new ones ☺️
So many topics…. what should I talk about?
It’s Sunday when I am doing the blog posts… and I find myself struggling to find a topic for the week. This week has been longer than usual for me… and we are going to be heading into a rough area of the year.
Why is that you might ask? Because of my birthday. It is the 13th of March. I struggle with my own birthday. The reason is that I honestly never expected to make it to 30… and I am going to be 48. I don’t know what to do with myself.
So I don’t know if I will be able to get the blog up for the week surrounding the 13th. I am already stressed out and struggling with my mental health.
I plan on trying to get it done… but I want to warn you that I am struggling with this one. That way if I don’t manage it no one is surprised. Yes, I do realize that I have a week before then… but I’m also starting to feel the quicksand of the birthday blues. So I am going to state the issue now and hope that I can overcome it by then.
Lyrics
I can’t still remember me and Miss November Rain
Beautiful and strange
Always so inclined, coloring outside the lines
Yeah, you were never on time
You’ve always been slightly awkward, kinda weird
Upside down and not all here
What’s a-wrong with me and you is crystal clear
Sometimes I’m in a room where I don’t belong
And the house is on fire and there’s no alarm
And the walls are melting too
How about you?
I’ve never been the favorite, thought I’d seen it all
‘Til I got my invitation to the lunatic ball
And my friends are comin’ too
How about you?
Don’t worry, it’s all just a symptom of being human
Unpack all your baggage
Hide it in the attic, where
You hope it disappears
This all seems so familiar
But it doesn’t feel like home
It’s just another unknown
You’ve always been slightly awkward, kinda weird
Upside down and not all here
Right a wrong, it’s all so crystal clear
Sometimes I’m in a room where I don’t belong
And the house is on fire and there’s no alarm
And the walls are melting too
How about you?
I’ve never been the favorite, thought I’d seen it all
‘Til I got my invitation to the lunatic ball
And my friends are comin’ too
How about you?
Don’t worry, it’s all just a symptom of being human
We’re all just passing through
Passengers on a ship of fools
We’re all just passing through
Passengers on a ship of fools
Sometimes I’m in a room where I don’t belong
And the house is on fire and there’s no alarm
And the walls are melting too
How about you?
I’ve never been the favorite, thought I’d seen it all
‘Til I got my invitation to the lunatic ball
And my friends are comin’ too
On a ship of fools
Don’t worry, it’s all just a symptom
Of being human
My 2 Cents –
This song just kinda hit… I so often feel like I am a weird little oddity and I don’t fit in. Even if I know that I am just human… I feel like I am so very strange… and it is nice to hear that I am not alone…
My flowers are incredibly simple to make. I place a small spot of color on the page and push it around until I get it looking like a flower. Perhaps because it is so easy is why I struggle to see them as being as amazing as everyone else seems to see them.
Pattimouse 