I know I should write,
Should create and
share my light.
I should tell my story
For all the world to hear.
Not today dear.
There is laundry
To wash, dry and fold.
There is blog entries
Left to be told.
Poetry I must
Write so well.
Social activity
To lessen my hell.
Not today dear,
Can’t you tell?
Today was just
A wee bit much,
So though there is
A lot of stuff
Requiring me to do….
Not today dear.
Life has a funny way of pushing forward, no matter how we want to stop and reevaluate. I have spent a significant portion of my life considering sanity. Afraid of being mad, and trying to prevent that slide into deeper pockets of madness. I joke that I am as sane as I have ever been… but to be honest I am not sure sanity is something that truly exists. I think as a whole the human race has slowly been decending into a state of madness. We put such a stigma on it. Just in America there are millions who suffer….yes millions. a statistics site about mental health. So why do we make these people feel worse for their suffering? I think it’s a form of fear. We fear what similarity we see in them. So we push it away. Instead, we should try to understand that which drives the mind down such different paths.
Blending in,
For now everyone
Has the traits
That used to mark me
As unique.
My idiosyncrasies
Are now community,
Nothing new or remarkable
In my mind today.
Was individual,
And even slightly weird,
Now everyone does
What i began.
So now i sit
And slightly sigh.
For looking around,
And dreaming that I
Could return to the time
When I was unique
Just once more.
My work in process, Elizabeth, is split between two different times. The first is 1494. Now i can keep it historically accurate. I have done the research. However, I am running into a flow issue… as well as a language synaptic issue. I know where i want to carry the story. It will be a romantic adventure circling around two women in the same family a century apart. I have posted the first chapter. I have chapter two written. It’s the third chapter where things fall apart.
. I wonder if it would be better just to write the story then go back and edit the language. I am not sure I really want to have the complete historical accuracy anyway. The language back then was extremely dry and wordy. Thus far I have only kept a slight accuracy. This story has been a W.I.P. for over 20 years. It would be nice to finally finish it.
Before I climb any soap box, I am a mother. I am not perfect. I firmly believe each child and each family are different. So even though my daughter is twelve, we allow her some media (movies, shows, music, books and video games) that is probably not “age appropriate .” She is more mature is some areas than others. So if the rating is for violence or vulgarity, I don’t worry about her. Her whole life, I have kept a close rein on what she watched. She has had leeway to choose.
She chooses horror, zombies and anime, hard rock, and rpg(shooter style). We talk to her. She understands that these are not reality. So we do tend to be less restrictive. I try to guide her towards intelligent programs. Towards a love of music that encompasses all music. Towards an open mind where media is concerned. I have succeeded and failed. After all, her father and her friends are influences as well.
The reason i am rambling, there have been a few instances where I have been accused of not being a good parent because I let her watch anime and play certain video games. I believe my child should have a chance to make her own choices ( to an extent). I keep away stuff that is heavily sexual. Blatantly sexual is more than i think she is ready for. I have forbidden only a couple of video games( gta5, south park stick of truth) and I don’t forbid music or books( most books with questionable content are still above her reading interest level for now ).
Very few shows are disallowed( got, banahee…basically stuff you would see on hbo, showtime or cinemax…) and it’s only if sex is open and blatant. Mind you not all kids are as mature as her. Some see violent or scary and have nightmares. She does not.
Really parenting is as much about knowing what will and will not be appropriate for your child as it is teaching them how to live. People who take their kids and let them watch a movie then complain about the content just ruin it for everyone. Know your kids, and be aware of what you are letting them be exposed to. It’s not that hard.
I spoke the truth
In a tiny voice,
I spoke the truth
To be told i lied.
I hang my head
in utter shame,
For i spoke the truth,
And you turned away.
I shook my hands,
With a frustrated cry,
Trying to just be heard.
I spoke the truth,
I did not lie.
I was brave,
Though inside i feared,
I spoke the truth,
It was denied.
How can i believe
That i will be safe?
For all is how he said,
I spoke the truth,
No one heard.
Grown and wary,
Weak and weary.
Haunted by what
Cannot ever be undone.
I spoke the truth,
When will i be
Believed?
Stolen from Facebook, was stolen by someone else from tumbler. Too funny not to share.
Welcome to my blog. ^_^
There’s room at the inn,
But I have no money to pay.
The world is cold tonight,
And I have no place to stay.
No I am not lazy,
Nor too awful crazy.
Things just really have not
Been going my way.
My stomach is a growling,
My head has been a spinning,
Yet not a bite can I find
For me to eat.
No jobs available for me to find,
Want a hand up?
must be outta my mind.
There’s room at the inn,
But I’ve no money to pay.
Searching within,
Trying just to see
The worth in me.
Silencing the voice
Deep within
Telling me,
Each and every
One of the flaws
Lest i forget.
Some days it’s easier
Some days i fail.
Still each day
Awaken and arise
Each day i search.
Never giving in,
Never giving up.
Someday the voice
I will cease.
My own worth
I will see.
You see me
As internet celebrity,
With no sign of lifestyle
Truth in chains.
Not one person
Really knowing me,
Hidden behind an easy profile.
According to you,
Written with naught
But imagination and lies.
Could it be?
that it’s you who
doesn’t see?
Who does not know
The real me?
quietly hiding,
From what you never
Tried to see.
Deeply imbedded
Within us.
Pattimouse 